dating introverts

A Great Way For Introverts to Date

If you are the shy thoughtful introvert, your dating history may look more like a thin notebook rather than a heavy romance novel. It’s not that it’s any less interesting to read, it’s just way shorter. Introverted people, by definition, are less likely to go out of their way to socially engage with others, which significantly limits the opportunity to ask people on dates. Social butterflies, on the other hand, live for communication. They can strike up a conversation with someone in like at a coffee shop or with a stranger in the park. Their chances of finding love end up being much higher. A great way for introverts to date is chat line dating and online dating.

That does not mean that shy people don’t deserve the same shot at love. Luckily, introvert-friendly ways of dating have been introduced to the world at alarming rates ranging from dating apps to speed dating events. There are also chat lines. Chat line dating is similar to dating on an app, but it doesn’t require an actual app. All communication is done over the phone. Traditional, yes. But a breath of fresh air. It’s perhaps the best way for introverted people to date for a few very important reasons.

The veil of the phone

Like any other form of dating that is done almost exclusively through a phone, there is an understood buffer between the users and their matches. This truly goes for all phone dating forms, including both apps and chat lines. It gives shy people a safe space to be social and flirt with potential romantic partners, thereby giving them a same (if not greater chance) at finding love as the social butterflies of the world. A person who goes through social anxiety on a daily basis, even to the point of being fearful of leaving the house, can sit and chat with a plethora of potential suitors.

On a normal blind date, an introverted person may feel nervous about how they appear, what their date will be like, or have social anxiety in general. This added weight and pressure to an already challenging situation, like a date, rarely yields positive results. Shy people often find themselves leaving these types of social situations concerned that they were unable to put their best foot forward and make a good impression due to the anxiety they felt. Using a phone as a buffer to eliminate that anxiety is incredibly helpful for shy people.


The safe practice of being social

What differentiates the chat line from the dating app is that you are forced to actually use your voice and think on your feet while using a chat line. You can’t type out your phrase, read it over, edit it, and then send. Rather, you are having a real conversation and using your voice to communicate quickly.

This may seem like a negative for shy people, but it’s actually a great way to practice being comfortable in social situations while still remaining physically in the comfort of your own space. It also forges more meaningful and genuine connections between matches, and quells the nerves of the first initial meet up. This is because a shy person knows more or less what he/she is getting into before the date starts. On a dating app, that person only has little chat bubbles and written text to understand and prepare themselves for that first real-life meeting situation.


The lack of flakes

In addition to forging genuine connections, chat lines also weed out the flakes. Perhaps the biggest issue with app dating is the fact that there are so many bored people who sit on dating apps, engage in meaningless interactions, and rarely (if ever) meet up with people who they feel interested in. It can be very discouraging for a shy person to spend hours on an app, move outside of their comfort zones, and then never find anyone who actually wants to meet up.

The beauty of the phone call is that it, again, requires more effort when flirting which forges a more genuine connection. This eliminates the people who engage in dating sites due simply to the fact that they are bored. In the end, this lack of flakiness actually creates stronger bonds between people and creates more lasting relationships.

online dating

Virtual dating – technology finds a solution during the pandemic

Dating isn’t easy in the best of times, but the Coronavirus pandemic has really put a strain on people’s relationships making virtual dating during the pandemic a preferred option whether you’re single or taken. Lockdown rules are changing every day, but for the time being the guidelines are clear – stay home and stay safe. 

If you’ve been single since March, this probably meant that you’ve had to take your dating online, or have dates 2 metres apart while wearing a mask. Romance in 2020 is very peculiar indeed and this time in our lives will probably be remembered for generations!

Let’s have a look at the different dating options you have available right now, whether you’re looking to find love and settle down or just have a little fun and curb your loneliness during the pandemic.

VR chat rooms

Let’s start with one that perhaps you hadn’t considered before – VR chat rooms. Imagine being able to create an entire world for you and your date and have your first meeting in outer space, in a perfect mansion of your design or even in the Wild West! There are a few VR chat rooms to choose from, such as VRChat. Even though this technology is fairly new, it is rapidly gaining popularity during the pandemic. 

There are usually public chat rooms as well as private ones, so you could potentially meet someone new in the VR chat itself, or bring your date there too. Of course it won’t be very realistic as both you and your date will have to create digital avatars so you could end up walking around with a green-haired anime character or Spongebob Squarepants, but the interactions will be real and the voices will be too. 

Not into dating cartoons? Hey, there’s always VR porn instead! It’s as close as it comes to real life love-making, and although you aren’t technically dating the characters in the films, it can still give you a real sense of intimacy that we’re all missing so much in lockdown. 

Zoom dates

Don’t you wish you had bought some Zoom shares back in 2019? This company definitely didn’t share our furlough worries, with everyone switching to Zoom for work meetings, checking in with family and friends and even dating!

It was so easy to date pre-pandemic times. You could meet anywhere and go anywhere you wanted. This year we’ve been limited to staying at home and having dates on our phones. It’s not as bad as it sounds though! It has actually given people the opportunity to learn more about each other during their first dates without the pressure of physical intimacy and you don’t have to deal with the distractions of a busy bar or restaurant. 

Make your Zoom dates a little more interesting than just a general chat – get creative by doing some art together, or do a virtual tour of a museum. Concerts are great fun in-person, but they’re actually well worth it online too! You could do an online escape room, watch a movie, share a dinner or drinks together or play some board games. Apps like Houseparty soared during the pandemic as it allowed people to play games together in a very easy way.

Way For Introverts to Date

Virtual singles gatherings

If you’re not having much luck on Tinder, perhaps an organised virtual gathering, such as those run by Here/Now would be more up your street. Instead of meeting just one person, you get to meet a whole group of them, so you have more options by the end of the night. 

They even give you activities to do that help spark conversation and take you beyond surface-level small talk. In their first ever meeting during the pandemic there were only two rules. The first: don’t talk about work. The second: don’t talk about quarantine. Afterwards, you just mark who you felt a spark with – either romantic or friendly and if it’s mutual, the agency will make the connection. 

Back to basics

Sometimes the old ways work best and by that we mean good old dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, Grindr or eHarmony. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that these apps saw a huge rise in usage since the start of the pandemic. With nothing much to do, people took to swiping to pass the time. 

You may be a little limited with what you can do on a date, but a walk around the park 2 metres apart is still on the table! Otherwise, you could always just chat online and get to know each other a bit better until lockdown is fully over.

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